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... A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of." ... The congregation of 500 members only has seven last names in the church directory. ... people think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy. ... the baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized washtub. ... the collection plates are hubcaps from a '56 Chevy. ... instead of bells, you are called to service by a duck call. ... the minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks. ... the communion wine is Boone's Farm "Strawberry Hill". ... that "Thou shall not covet" thing applies to huntin' dogs, too.This one is compliments of Earl JohnA young couple, were just back from their honeymoon, and settling in to a life of married bliss when ... The first Monday morning back, the young wife suddenly slaps her husband, very hard, as they lay there sleeping. While they are having breakfast he asks her why she did it. She denies any such. “Well, if she wants to see anything than she got to show me something,” Jim told them point blank. “I’ve got to see her naked just like I’ve got to see you naked.”“Naked?” Kelly asked in shock.“Hell, yeah,” he reiterated. “How else am I going to see ya?” he asked incredulously.“I ah, I don’t know, I guess. I didn’t think about being seen naked before. I just thought about pulling down my panties or something like that,” she said with a red face. “My gosh, why didn’t I think of that before I asked him,” she thought.She turned and looked at Susan and she saw a scared looked on her face. She was shaking her head no and Kelly had a pleading look on hers. “Okay, we’ll do it,” she answered for her friend but Susan turned white as she heard it come out of Kelly’s mouth.“Kelly?” Susan exclaimed. “I’m not going to get naked in front of your brother!”“Susan, you wanted me to ask so I asked him, right? And now he said yes, but with one stimulation, right? Now don’t you want to go.
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